Today I had to make a call to the United States to participate in a teleclass that went for about an hour. I haven’t made any long distance calls recently, preferring to use Skype for international communication, but this option wasn’t available for this particular call so it was the old fashioned way…by telephone. Because I haven’t called internationally for a while I thought I’d better find out what current international call rates were from my fixed line phone. So I decided to ring Telstra (our national telco) …that was my first mistake.
I began to navigate my way through the labyrinthine recorded options but after some time it became apparent that my seemingly simple request was too much for the robot. It asked me if I wanted to be put through to a ‘consultant’ I pressed ‘1’ for yes. That was my second mistake.
My consultant ‘John’ was very nice, extremely courteous and used lots of Autralianisms like ‘no worries’ making me feel very safe and at home. Ahem.
I posed my question “Hello John! What are the current call rates to the United States from my fixed line phone…I’m on the ‘Telstra Home Reach’ plan”.
Silence.
Then John asked me to hold for ‘a couple of minutes’. Five minutes later he came back and asked me who was calling me from the States. I told him ‘no-one, I’m calling them’ and I repeated my request. He put me on hold again.
Next time he came back he asked me about my mobile phone. I told him it had nothing to do with my mobile, I was calling the United States from my FIXED LINE.
Silence.
He put me on hold again.
This went on for some time…eventually he worked out what I wanted and began to explain the various options. That conversation made my ears bleed. Here’s a sample:
John (heavily accented): If you call 0018 to a fixed line it is half hour free and $5.25
Me: Eh?
John: repeated the above
Me: What's free?
John: Half hour and $5.25
Me: Is it $5.25 per half hour?
John: Yes…………….and free.
Me: Which?
John: Half hour.
Me: No....is it $5.25 OR is it free?
John: Yes.
Me: It can't be both.
John: Yes
Me: No, it can't, it's either $5.25 or free....
John: Yes. It's $5.25…………….and free.
Me: Sigh. Is $5.25 for half an hour AND THEN free?
John: Yes…………….no, it's $5.25 and free.
Me: Aaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!
It was all like that. In total I spent 45 minutes on the phone with an enquiry which should have taken 5 minutes at the absolutely maximum.
I made the call anyway, I just hope I don’t get a bill for $80.
