Mondegreens and more screen printing

In my family there are a few tales of mondegreens, especially those committed (does one commit a mondegreen?) by my Dad, who always ended up preferring his version over the correct one. I could bore you with quite a few but as they are always better when presented verbally I'll limit it to two. The reason I thought of them was because this morning as we drove to school Aislin was in the back listening to an iPod and singing loudly and tunelessly along. She particularly enjoys a boppy song by Shakira that has a line that goes 'I'm at your fee-e-eet'. I nearly snorted my takeaway coffee down my nose when I heard Aislin sing 'I'm a trap-ee-ee-ze'. It reminded me of a lyrical faux pas of my own when I was about her age. We were out driving in the car as well and I was in the back singing 'Onward Christian Soldiers' very loudly (I come from a long line of car singers) and I almost caused my Dad to hit a tree when I came to the line 'Christ the royal master leads against the foe' I sang 'Christ the royal martian eats it with a fork'. Made sense to me.

I do have to wonder what kind of miniature religious zealot I was singing such a song while out on a family drive. Not to worry, it obviously didn't last.

Today I was at the school for yet another session of screen printing that I had managed to get roped into vounteered for. Four of the pictures needed to be re-done because an over-enthusiastic father had come in to help and used too much paint causing them to resemble swamp scenes rather than undersea worlds. It was doubly tedious because we had to re-cut all the templates then do the entire thing again (I won't explain further, trust me, it was BORING, FIDDLY and TIME CONSUMING). It was such slow going I could cheerfully have poked my eyes out with a stick but finally we got the first one finished, we stepped back to admire our work and all was good with the world.

We got started on the second one.....some looooong time later after much cutting and blobbing and scraping we once again stepped back and admired. At this point a boy from Hannah's class wandered in to have a look, as he thoughtfully admired the work with us he idly spun a pair of scissors round his finger.....until they flew off and skidded across the painting smudging it right through the middle. I let out a cry and stared in horror at the mess....then I kind of groaned and put my head in my hands (yep, melodramatic - that's me). The poor kid looked as though he might cry and when I raised my head and looked at him my expression must have been somehow frightening because he ran off (he actually did run ha ha ha ha ha..... I mean.. poor kid).

It had taken us two hours to do 2 of the bloody things and now one was ruined. I don't think I'm a cruel person and I know it was an accident but I could have wrapped that ruined painting round his irritating little head. Apparently we're not allowed to do that so I just sulked for a minute then resigned myself to the fact that we'd be doing another session sometime soon. sigh.

Ok, come on.....share your mondegreens......