What happened next

When I titled yesterday's post 'Unexpected' I hadn't yet realised the full significance of this turn of events. Last night was fairly smooth, Tom was here and when Aislin needed help to get somewhere (not having quite mastered the crutches yet) he was able to pick her up and carry her wherever she needed to be. I can do it if I have to, but he's taller and stronger than me and it's effortless to him. To me...well...she's heavy and all arms and legs - difficult to wrangle.

This morning she woke up at 6am and needed to go to the toilet. I could hear her struggling with the crutches so I jumped up and went through and as her need was urgent I carried her there. She was wide awake by then and I asked if she wanted a drink and she did so we just got up even though we could have safely had another hour in bed (sigh). Then there was a flurry of the usual morning activity, breakfast, getting dressed, making sure Hannah had all her swimming gear and so on. All the time giving Aislin extra help because everything is more of a challenge for her right now, carrying her down the steps from the front door, lifting her into the car etc. We took Hannah to school and Aislin waited in the car reading a book while I dashed in to tell the teacher what was going on. We came home and I lifted her out of the car and back up the steps. It was only 9.05 and I was buggered.

She wanted me to play a game with her, I looked at the pile of work I had to do and settled down resignedly to play several games of Junior Scrabble. Then we did two (big) jigsaws. It went on like that all day with supervising her practicing on her crutches as an added extra.

This afternoon we went to pick up Hannah, I had a pile of library books to return and I planned to drop them off on the way to school, we got to the library I looked at the books, looked at Aislin and discovered the flaw in my plan. I couldn't carry the books and help her. So I gathered up the books, and made a dash for the return chute leaving Aislin in the car in a public car park. Something I hate doing. It was only a couple of minutes and I could see the car (which I'd locked) the whole time but it felt bad.

After we picked up Hannah I remembered I needed to go to the supermarket - we were nearly out of some essentials that couldn't wait. Again I looked at Aislin and wondered how I'd get round the supermarket with her...she's not ready for a marathon effort like that on crutches yet. In the end (you should thank me that you're not getting the full version here....stuff happened) I squeezed her into the tiny toddler trolley seat - not easy with a gangly 5 year old with a gigantic left foot. After we'd done the shopping (all the while listening to 'Mummy, this seat is hurting me...) we got back to the car, unpacked the shopping then tried to prise Aislin back out of the trolley....there was a while there that I thought we were going to just have to bring the whole thing home with Aislin still in it and wait until Tom got home so he could take it apart and set her free using his angle grinder. Fortunately it didn't come to that.

This is hard, but I'm not complaining because I know it is NOTHING compared to what some carers are doing 24 hours a day, every day of their lives, for people much bigger and heavier and more seriously disabled than Aislin is right now. I'm just saying that it is much more challenging than I realised it was going to be....not the carrying so much as the logistics of doing anything with someone who isn't fully operational.

This week is going to be fun...I have an appointment with the hairdresser, a doctor's appointment (where I also have to see the nurse for an injection) and Aislin's specialist appointment on Thursday.....how am I going to negotiate these? Oh don't worry...you're sure to hear all about it.