Friday, June 29

Blissfully unemployed

My last day went well, I managed to not disgrace myself and left with my dignity intact. I came home feeling a bit strange but pretty good about the whole thing. I woke at 3.30am in one of those absolute panics, sometimes known as an 'oh fuck' moment. However after several sleepless hours and a day to think about it I'm over it and feeling pretty excited about the whole thing. Watch this space for news of the next big thing.

So I really am facing the first day of the rest of my life.

Oh and I got a voucher to buy myself a nice new camera.

This weekend we have a house full of children. Well four of them. It just feels like a house full. Our two girls and our two nephews. It's only been two hours and it's like 'Lord of the Flies' around here. Poor Tom drew the short straw is reading stories tonight, of course that means I get tomorrow night but with a bit of luck I'll be down with Bubonic Plague or similar and not actually have to go into a room alone with them. I promised Tom if he's not out in an hour I'll call the police...'cos I'm sure as hell not going in there.

If I don't get back to the blogging in the next few days would someone please notify the authorities. Just in case they've eaten us.

Monday, June 25

Next Thursday will be a good day

Last Thursday I wrote a 'to do' list. When I regained consciousness I hyperventilated. When that stopped I passed out again. So now I carry a brown paper bag everywhere with me and have a cotton ball soaked in smelling salts permanently taped to my nose. Because I'm freaking out just slightly. And that is why, yesterday, in one day, I wrote 2 assignments. Granted, they are very likely the crappest assignments I've ever written, but they're done. I still have one to do, and at the rate I'm knocking them out that should be finished by lunchtime. Except this one is hard dammit.

When that is finished I will commence marking the 3 million assignments that my students have kindly completed for me. I will need drugs and alcohol to get me through that I can tell you.

When that is finished I will be back at work for my last 2 days. I will be clearing my desk, emptying my bookcase and packing up the books, clearing out my computer files, removing pictures, photos and other paraphenalia from my walls, archiving old crap, chucking a ton of stuff in the recycling bin and probably marking some more assignments that panicky little bastards students are trying to get to me before I leave. I mean, really, it's not like it's nuclear holocaust or anything there are other lecturers that can mark your damn assignments! Pfft.

When that is finished I will be drinking. Cocktails. FREE cocktails. And farewelling my colleagues and accepting gifts (I'm not being presumptious here, they've told me there are gifts). And drinking some more, because, well....I'm leaving and the booze is free. So possibly getting tipsy and doing some serious bridge burning with my boss.

When that is finished I'm coming home to put my feet up and watch the first episode of the new series of Dr Who.


Friday, June 22

The second special June birthday

On the 18th of this month, Hannah, my firstborn, turned seven. When she was born, 11 weeks premature and weighing only 1120 grams, it was hard to imagine what she'd be like at one, never mind seven!! It was a scary time but here she is, growing up and so smart and funny she leaves me for dead. But there's something else about Hannah, she is the singularly most forgiving child I've ever met. Yesterday I had to get into work early, it was a crazy, stressful morning trying to get myself and the kids ready. I finally got her and I into the car and I headed off to drop her at school. It was only then I found out that she had a shared lunch at school that day!!!! I shamefully admit now to being snappy and cross. She just sat quietly while I ranted about needing to know these things in advance and how stopping at the supermarket now was going to make me late. A few minutes later I apologised for my outburst. Her response? 'It's ok Mummy, if sometimes I have to be spoken to'. Ok, just tear out my heart why don't you? On Wednesday I forgot to pack her a sandwich (hey, it's been a hectic week) she had a lunch box full of snacks but no sandwich, again I apologised. She said 'it's ok, I ate my snacks and had a cup of milo'. No matter what wrongs I do, what I forget or what she has to tolerate, she just forgives.

If it's true that every person in our lives has a lesson to teach us then I know what hers is for me, and trust me, I really need to learn that lesson from this child.

Let's move on now from my parenting misdemenours. When we asked Hannah what she wanted for her birthday this year she replied 'stickers'. Hmmm, 'stickers eh?' I thought to myself, 'that's easy'. Then she added that she also wanted a USB drive. How the world is changing when my seven year old daughter wants a USB drive for her birthday. Her Aunty asked if she needed that because she has lots of files. The answer to that would be 'yes'. So she got her USB drive, a load of stickers, some very trendy boots from her Grandparents and some DVDs and books. She was happy. And when she's happy, so am I.

Happy SEVEN beautiful girl.

June - slow blogging month

Holy crap I've been slack on the blogging this month. You would not believe how busy I am, and it's frustrating because I actually do have a lot to say for a change.

For a start there have been two very special birthdays. First, my baby sister turned 34 on the 10th. I intended to write her a whole blog to herself telling her how awesome she is - because I know 'awesome' is one of her favourite words (I'm being ironic here). But the days got away from me and it didn't happen. I feel a bit bad about that because I love her A LOT and I don't want her to think she's less important than my other sister who got a whole blog to herself in March.

So Fi, this is for you.

I love you A LOT (have I mentioned that). I don't have the same shocked and resentful memories of your arrival into the family that I do of Moy's, I do remember however, that I really wanted a brother. I totally believed that, as there were already two girls in this family, the next child would be a boy. It just had to be. I was very surprised when it was another girl. If I'd been street savvy back then I swear (no pun intended) I'd have said WTF? I didn't though, I just took it in my (slightly bewildered) stride and got used to the fact pretty quickly. You were so cute but sheesh...noisy? Boy could you cry - that wasn't fun. So then it was a case of watching you grow up, and by the time you got to about 5 you'd overtaken me in the maturity stakes. It is still the same today. You have all the answers, you know just what to tell me even if it's not exactly what I want to hear. As soon as something (anything) happens in my life the first thing I think of is telling you (and Moy). The 50 emails we exchange every day will testify to this fact. You are absolutey, without question my very best friend (yes Moy, you are too but it's not about you today) and I'm SOOOO glad to have you in my life.

Now would you like to hear 10 special things about you? No? Well, I'm going to anyway, cos I know you love the mushy stuff.
  1. You are the world's best researcher - you can find out everything about anything.
  2. You tolerate my eccentricities and hardly raise an eyebrow (at least not in front of me).
  3. You are the world's greatest mother (even though you don't think you are).
  4. You are incredibly funny and make me laugh every day.
  5. You love strollers and know everything about them (which has given me a business idea for you - tell you later).
  6. I don't have to remember anything because you remember everything - including stuff about my friends that I've forgotten.
  7. We can email chat for hours about David Tennant (drool).
  8. I can tell you anything.
  9. You have sometimes had to put up with more than anyone should and you will still care about what is happening to me and Moy and our families. And seriously, at those times, you would have been well within your rights to not give a shit.
  10. Like me, you think people who say AWESOME are lame, but will think it's funny that I am telling you that you are AWESOME!!!!

Belated happy internet birthday wishes from me, I would be lost and heartbroken without you. In the words of Tinky Winky Biiiiggggg Huuuuggg!!!

Love you. XX

Saturday, June 9

Blogging on the quiet

It's quiet around here this weekend, just me and Sophie (the cat). And she doesn't say much. Well she says plenty when she feels it's time to be fed but apart from that she's pretty quiet. She lies around a lot, honours me with her presence on the couch from time to time and lets me know, in no uncertain terms, that she is in charge and I am her people. I respond to this, as most cat owners do, by pathetically grasping for any attention she might give me and rushing to feed her at the first impatient mew. I think I behave a lot like Queen Victoria's servants did. And she certainly acts a lot like Queen Victoria.

She was sleeping on the couch when I went out today and I was gone for 3 hours. She was still in exactly the same spot when I came back. You'd think she'd be fat, but she's not. All she does is eat and sleep and go outside maybe twice a day and she never puts on weight. How great would that be? I wish I was a cat. Although I'm sure I'd miss my opposable thumbs.

You can tell it's quiet can't you. I'm blogging about the cat.

I could blog about other things. Like Paris Hilton. What a fuss she's making about being sent back to jail. Silly cow.

Ok, that's that topic covered.

Enough already, it's bedtime.

Friday, June 8


Remember the 5 minute web design? Well they have it in theory. Sure you can sign up, choose your design then add all your stuff, press 'publish' and you'll have a website. I'm sure it is possible to do that. When I joined up the lady on the phone said 'you can have your website up by this afternoon'. That was last Tuesday. No, it's not up yet........alright??? There is a small problem - it's the 'choose your design' part. I am ready to kill someone. It's hard to choose, they brag about having over 800 templates. Here's a head ups people 800 templates is TOO FREAKING MANY!!!! Honestly I'm going insane with the damn things. Sure I'll admit that I'm not famous for my ability to make a choice over just about anything but geez, the most decisive, emphatic king of all choosers would struggle with this.

It's very hard. Then this morning I thought I had it. I had finally decided on one, 'Venetian' if you're interested. But somehow between the 'which one would you like' and 'yes please I'll have this one' the damn thing disappeared!! So I couldn't have it. I can tell you there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth after that little debacle. So it's back to the drawing board, but seriously, I can hardly bare it. I know I have to just get on with it, and I will. But once I've made that decision I don't want to make any more, they better not ask me how many pages I want or what colour text I'd like or where I want my pictures. They'd just better not.

I've got no hope have I? Crap.

Monday, June 4

Dream date

On Saturday Tom's brother and his lovely wife looked after our girls for the day. The whole day. They have two boys and those four kids just have a ball together. We dropped them off at 8.15am and didn't have to pick them up until 5pm. WOO HOO!! Yeah, I know, it's cool isn't it?

So I know you're dying to hear what we did, how did Tom and I spend our day of freedom? Walking on the beach? Lunch in a fabulous restaurant? Movies? Seeing and being seen with the cafe set? Nope. We went to a financial seminar. We sat together though.

There we were, the whole day, with our noses glued to the screen of our laptop messing with figures. It was useful, it was helpful, it was even fairly interesting at times. Romantic and exciting? Not so much.

We sure know how to party.