A couple of weeks ago I mentioned that the blog was going to get a makeover for it's blogiversary. Hopefully that will be gradually happening over the next few days (or not). If you stop by and find things a little chaotic, don't be alarmed - it's just the renovation in progress. If you stop by and find the blog missing completely please be alarmed...it means I've screwed it up.
Better remember to back everything up before I start.
Committing to noticing the Grace in Small Things immediately caused me to start...well, noticing the Grace in Small Things. Today I have a small selection....
1. Watermelon...is there any other fruit so sweet and juicy and thirst quenching and BEAUTIFUL? That colour.....glorious.
2. Candlelight - no need to explain I'm sure.
3. Air conditioning....when it's 110 114 degrees in the shade out there (like today). To be inside, with the whole house cool and (relatively) silent, is a wonderful thing.
4. My morning coffee. Utter happiness.
5. Sleep...when it comes, as it did last night - with dreams.
Now I can't promise that all my Grace in Small Things posts will be pictorial. Some might be, some will be a list, some will part of a blog post. However it is delivered it will be the genuine reflections of my observations of Grace in my daily life.
Feel free to add your own to my list via comments, I'd love to know what yours were today.
Most of you will know I'm not a schmaltzy type...I can be very emotional and fairly often spill my guts about stuff that would be better told to a therapist, but on the whole I'm pretty practical and not given to profound and mushy statements. However just recently I have been experiencing a bit of emotional melt-down, a slight 'life crisis' (note I leave out 'mid' - I'm in denial about that). I've complained a lot, cried a bit, felt overwhelmed, frustrated, sad, depressed, irritated and generally just a whiny pain the arse.
Today I found a journal from about 4 years ago. I read some entries and smacked my head against a wall...talk about history repeating...or perhaps it just hasn't stopped. Maybe I've been having the same emotional melt-downs and crises for years. In fact I think I have.
This has to stop. By constantly coming up against the same issues and then constantly complaining about those same issues I am just reinforcing it in my own mind and in my life. It's stupid, it's pointless and I realised today I am wasting YEARS doing it.
So when I stumbled across this blog entry it occurred to me that too rarely do I stop and see the 'Grace in Small Things'. I'm not one for a gratitude journal or a daily passage from the bible - not that there's anything wrong with those things, I am very grateful for lots of stuff I just don't write about it daily and really, I'm just not going to do a bible reading every day either (I know... I'm going to hell) but I think I can find 5 small things to write about for 365 days. They don't have to be consecutive days, so it might take me 5 years. In fact the exact words of the creator of 'Grace in Small Things' are 'Do it once a week, a month, three times a day. Any old rules will do'.
I also might repeat sometimes (well how can I remember them all?). But more importantly it might just make me stop a bit more often and recognise how fortunate I am and how truly surrounded I am by Grace.
In doing this I hope I will also move on from the stuff I can't change and makes the changes I need to make in the places I can. I know it won't happen overnight and I'm sure I'll fall off the wagon from time to time...but I also have to accept that.
After all, we're all a 'work in progress' aren't we?
For more info about 'The Grace in Small Things' go here.
...have a barbecue....
...watch the fireworks.....
..wherever you are, whether celebrating or not, be sure to have a great day!
Today is a slow news day at my place, just a lot of faffing around really. So I broke into Dave's blog while he was asleep and stole this meme.
1. What was the first car you drove (legally)? The first car I drove (as a learner) was a boyfriend's Honda Civic. The first car I owned, immediately after passing my driving test, was a red Renault 5 which I named Rasputin. I loved that car.
2. How many colours has your hair been? It was quite fair when I was a child, it got darker and is naturally dark brown. I've tried various colours, blonde, blonde highlights, dark with plummy highlights and so on. Now it is just dark brown.3. Have you ever been fired? No. I have had to fire other people though. That's not pleasant.
4. What do you sing in the shower? I don't, I sing in the car a lot though.5. If you could be any celebrity, who would you be? I wouldn't want to be any celebrity, they're prats.
6. Who was your favourite teacher and why? My grade 5 teacher, Miss Holden. She was a left wing, feminist, hippy (although I didn't realise it at the time). She taught us about current affairs and politics and women's rights - I don't know if she was supposed to, but I thought she was fantastic. She's probably responsible for my left wing hippy views today.7. If you had a nickname, what is it, if not, what would you like it to be? Don't have one, some people call me Caity which I tolerate but no, no nicknames. I have no desire for a nickname.
8. What would the title to the movie about your life be? They're making a movie about my life? OMG, really? What's it called? Oh. That was cruel...I'm not playing anymore.Feel free to do this meme I'm quite sure Dave and whoever he nicked it from won't mind.
Oops, Dave just pointed out that I missed half the meme...silly me...here's the rest....
9. If we say we are here to help others, then what are others here for? I dunno...to wash the dishes?
10. Who was your first crush? I have no idea, perhaps I could just make it up.
11. Do you believe in karma? Hmmm, not sure...kind of....that doesn't really answer the question does it?
12. What are the best and worst inventions, in your opinion? The internet is the best (my rice maker comes a close second) and those automatic, recorded, phone answering thingies you get whenever you ring any organisation these days are the worst...by far.
13. What is the worst physical injury youʼve ever had? I tore a disk in my back once. That hurt. I;'ve had a broken wrist and collar bone, they both hurt too.
14. Who is your favourite Batman? Do you mean my favourite actor who plays Batman? I don't know because I'm not a fan of Batman although I have seen the two most recent ones (Batman Begins and Dark knight) and that guy playing Batman seems ok to me.
15. What is your very earliest memory? About 2, standing at the window waving my parents off as they went away leaving me with my Gran. As much as I loved my Gran and desperately wanted to stay with her, I recall feeling totally abandoned as my parents disappeared into the distance. I think it was the first time I'd been left overnight without them.
16. Is there any animal/creature that creeps you out? Cybermen. Daleks are scary too but Cybermen win.
Bloody hell...I missed another TWO...what is wrong with me??? Here they are....
17. Which is the place that youʼve never been that you'd most like to visit? Oooh, so many! Top of the list....Norway and Turkey.
18. When you were a child, what did you want to be when you grew up? When I was very young I had a ladybird book about jobs and there was a page in it about being a 'kennel maid'. I loved dogs even then and my childish heart soared at the idea of a job looking after dogs all day.
Ok, I hope that's finally it...this has turned into the meme from hell...or the meme that won't go away...or the meminator...or something.
...the TV is broken! Normally I wouldn't bother...if it's not Midsomer season or time for a new series of Dr Who I could care less (no, really) however there is a Dr Who special episode on tomorrow and we have no TV. I'm desolate.
I don't give a toss about Big Brother, Idol or Oprah...I never watch soaps and I only occasionally partake of CSI (although I quite like it...and some of those other American acronyms NCIS, Law & Order SVU - not SUV as I once said - a police show about Range Rovers). No, TV is not vital to my life. Movies are, I like a good film, but at least I can watch them on the laptop if need be.
But Dr Who....!!! It's more than a girl can bear.
Gratuitous picture of the current doctor...
...and a dalek.
There have been some other activities, the girls had 'sleep overs' at friends' homes at the weekend, we had dinner with some friends on Sunday night and lunch with them on Monday too... not planned but just the way things worked out.
I'm experiencing one of my sleepless episodes, I've mentioned before that I occasionally suffer from insomnia and can be found creeping round the house at 3am. Last night I just couldn't get to sleep at all, I got up and stared at the television for a while...I could have live blogged the inauguration but I didn't. Momentous as it was. I eventually went back to bed and continued to toss and turn for a while. The last time I looked at the clock it was 4.27am. I slept soon after that I think...until 7am. I'm tired.
I'll leave you with this image...the tag cloud of President Obama's inauguration speech..
... it came from here if you're interested.
A couple of blasts from the past.....there's this one....
..and this one....
Familiar to anyone?
I came across this list (below) today on Facebook, posted there by one of my Facebook friends Vanessa Smith. It comes from Nithya Shanti. It made me stop and think about how I live my life. It was just what I needed to hear after yesterday's post. I really do believe that we create our own reality (as hocus pocus as I know some people find that) I think that our life reflects what is going on in our heads and hearts. To remedy unhappiness I am sure it is important to do more of the simple things and live a life of gratitude, doing this can only lead to happiness. Can't it?
So instead of being miserable about what I don't want, maybe I can follow these simple steps and trust that doing so will lead me to the answers I need and ultimately, to whatever it is I do want.
This is what I often tell my own clients in meditation and personal development workshops. Maybe it's time I took my own advice?
1. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day. And while you walk, smile.
2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
3. Sleep for 7 hours.
4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
5. Play more games.
6. Read more books than you did the previous year.
7. Make time to practice meditation, yoga, and prayer. They provide us with daily fuel for our busy lives.
8. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
9. Dream more while you are awake.
10. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
11. Drink plenty of water.
12. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
13. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.
14. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
15. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
16. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
17. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
18. Smile and laugh more.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
20. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
21. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
22. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
23. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about. Don't compare your partner with others.
24. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
25. Forgive everyone for everything.
26. What other people think of you is none of your business.
27. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
28. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
29. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
30. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
31. The best is yet to come.
32. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
33. Do the right thing!
34. Call your family often.
35. Your inner most is always happy. So be happy.
36. Each day give something good to others.
37. Don't over do. Keep your limits.
38. Share this with someone you care about*
*Which is why I'm sharing it with you....
24 and 31 and particularly resonate with me.
I think it's very telling that it has taken two years of blogging for me to create a label called 'Happiness'. Tut tut.
For some reason today I'm feeling a little flat (in the emotional sense). It isn't full blown depression just a general feeling of discontent, overwhelm, pointlessness and frustration (oh, is that all?). I'm tired, that doesn't help. I'm trying to remain excited about the 'new year', maintaining enthusiasm for my plans and goals but some days it feels as though nothing works.
What I am coming to understand is that whenever I feel this way it's usually about work. It's never about my family, that's all good, it's not about my health, it's occasionally about homesickness, sometimes it's frustration about our lack of progress with the renovation. But the real moping, whining, complaining stuff is all about work.
Obviously I'm a slow learner because it's taken me this long to realise that it's a major source of unhappiness for me. Seems I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up.
Now I just have to decide what to do about it.
It doesn't seem that long ago that I embarked on this crazy journey, spilling my guts to complete strangers in a very public way. But here I am, 2 years on and still doing it (albeit somewhat erratically).
For it's birthday I am giving the blog a makeover, not today...too busy, but over the next week or two (or three...depending how things go).
ALSO... Dave and Z follow this blog now (over there...on the right)! Thank you both.
...today. Well, not entirely nothing. First there was swimming (yes I know I'm not supposed to take pictures, what can I say? I'm a rule breaker - recognise anyone? No, didn't think so). The girls both successfully completed their levels and were happy.
I sat under a tree and read while they swam (that's the tree not me).
As we left we stopped at the kiosk to buy a celebratory ice cream. I noticed that they had Monaco Bars, something Cathy has been blogging about here, here and also here. So I thought 'ok, I'm going to get one of those and see what all the fuss is about'.
Now I can see why people mounted a petition to bring back the Monaco Bar...and kudos to Nestle who listened to their customers and brought it back. All I can say is that it's a good job I didn't discover the kiosk had them on day 1 of swimming lessons.
Oh and it's very hot today.
The end.
..don't you think?
I think I need a bit of a change, the blog needs an upgrade...I'm bored with the template and the banner (although I took that photo, lovely isn't it?). So sometime in the next week or two I shall do some blog housekeeping. I'm just warning you in case you click over, see something unfamiliar and click away again apologising profusely for the intrusion - like when you walk in on someone in the bathroom, or in a state of undress or whatever.
Not much other news today, took the girls to their swimming lesson (last day tomorrow), bought strawberries on the way home and now I have some work (real, paid work) to do. Which I am obviously procrastinating about...but you knew that didn't you?
One more thing...tomorrow.... look at the maximum!!! Yikes! I might expire.
Oh... another 'one more thing'...I have a follower...look over there on the right...
I feel special now.
Summing up 2008 with a meme...how original. This one was quite good, it made me think a bit, I'm trying to think because I want a better year than last.
Also, a warning...foul language alert.
I recently read Philip Pullman's 'His Dark Materials' trilogy and loved it. Since finishing the books I've been thinking a bit about the idea of a 'daemon' and wondering what mine would be. Then I found this test on Solsticedreamer's blog and I got very excited (yes, I know, I need to get out more).
So I did it and here are my results. I didn't care much about the text (although it is rather accurate) I just wanted to know what my animal would be. I like the choices, I think I'm going with the Snowy Owl.
Your result for The Golden Compass Daemon Test...
You are calm and logical, but not unemotional. You are an introvert, at heart, preferring to read alone than be subjected to the crush and noise of a big party or bar. You have a few friends and family, whose presence you welcome - to a point. Even they can wear on your nerves eventually, and you need to retreat back into your personal space for a while so you can recharge. Your energy comes in bursts, after which you need a long nap or a couple of evenings at home to recuperate.
You are comfortable with yourself, and reasonably confident. You want the friendship and goodwill of others, but you are not willing to sacrifice your principles in order to get it. If your close friends need something that you can provide, however, you will be the first to offer it.
You are a good and sympathetic listener, and are aware of your friend's emotional states. With your very close friends, you will open up, but rarely - you don't like to burden people with your problems. At the same time, though, you are honest and are not willing to alter the truth for the sake of convenience. Among strangers you are reserved, and may resort to making jokes to disguise your true feelings.
While you are not afraid of conflict, you do not seek it, either. When you are hurt or insulted, you feel that you have a choice to make. You can choose to take them up on it and defend yourself, or you can let it pass. Your decision may depend on how well you know the person, how personally you take the insult, or simply what mood you are in that day. Your friends may not always know how you are going to react for that reason. Whatever your reaction though, you will be logical, rational and unnervingly accurate: a measured strike.
Your daemon's form would represent your calm, introverted nature, your cool logic, and your impatience with crowds of people. He or she would probably whisper ironic comments in your ear, give logical advice and try to hide his or her soft side from everyone, even you.
Suggested forms:
Peregrine Falcon, Snowy Owl, Snow Leopard, Siberian Tiger, Osprey.
That's me.
I just haven't felt much felt like it for the past few days. Nothing serious, just busy being on holiday with Tom and the girls. I'm sure when things get back to 'normal' I'll regain my interest but right now it's a bit all over the place.
I've also been giving a lot of thought to 2009 and deciding what I want to do and how I intend to go about doing it. It's all very deep and profound (not really). I'm looking forward to this year and I feel quite positive about it, but still a little uncertain of my direction. This is nothing new, I've been having this internal debate for about 6 months and I feel like I'm at a bit of a crossroads. I think I just need to make a decision and get on with it.
So if the posts continue to be erratic you'll know why.
We've had rather a lovely week. The girls have had swimming lessons every morning (no photos, cameras not allowed) so we've been getting up, having a leisurely breakfast, getting ready and heading to the pool. It's been warm except for yesterday, so T and I sit in the shade of a tree and watch the lesson, chat to each other or read our books. It's all very relaxing.
There are all sorts of farms and orchards in our area so on the drive home (only 15 minutes) we stop and buy locally produced fruit. My favourite is the strawberry farm where we buy big punnets of fresh strawberries, the ones they consider 'seconds', usually because of size or shape, but I think they are best ones.
The girls always eat a couple before we get home and the smell of fresh strawberries fills the car.
So far no-one is sick of strawberries.
I've been meaning to get this done for a week and today I finally got around to going through the Christmas holiday photos. Here is a small selection for your viewing pleasure.
The captions are clockwise.....(no, they're not...Dave pointed out my error - thank you Dave - they are actually left to right).
1. Queuing for a parking space pre-Christmas 2. Tom took the girls for a sushi lunch while I did some Christmas shopping 3. Finally in the car ready to go (and yes, that is the cat, she came too) 4. The makeshift driftwood Christmas tree at the beach house (I love it) .
1. Christmas Eve mass with their cousins on Tom's side (the boys in the picture, not the holy family and shepherd, I'll refrain from making any comments hinting that some people in Tom's family might think they're Jesus Christ...oops, too late) 2. Lighting candles for loved ones lost 3. Whisky, shortbread and cherries for Santa (the girls like to give him something seasonal hence the cherries, they can't believe he'd actually enjoy whisky) 4. Christmas morning, presents!
Post Christmas beachery, it was very, very windy... 1. Hannah in danger of being blown away attached to a Body Board 2. Tom had a surf then gave Hannah her first surfing lesson 3. Aislin battling the wind to get back to me and a warm cuddle 4. I didn't do anything but this.
Another beach on a different coast with more cousins (this time my family). It was even more windy and this time freezing cold which didn't seem to affect the children as you can see. 1. It was very choppy out there 2. Aislin and Emily running away from the waves 3. Hannah, Aislin and their big cousin Jacob 4. The sensible one, Alexandra, she didn't go in .
Afterwards they were freezing cold and windblown, we went to a cafe for hot chocolate. 1. I think they're adorable (even if Jacob does look a bit bored, it could be because of the 15,000 photos his mother and I took). 2. They talk nearly as much as their mother and I do, it's nice they like each other so much. 3. They think they're hilarious (they're not, well only sometimes). 4. Important spoon balancing skills while your cousin has her second hot chocolate.
So there you have it, a pictorial guide to our Christmas break.
That'll do for today.
Yesterday we decided that the girls' room really needed a clear out. I go in there fairly regularly and 'cull' some of the stuff that has somehow accumulated. However this time we decided that we would take everything out of the room, sort it all out and do a bit of decluttering then put back what was left. We would also sort and organise everything so that the children could easily find (and put away...ha ha) their toys.
So we pulled out every container, tray, toy and 'treasure box' into the middle of the living room floor...and onto chairs...and the sofa...and the dining table...and the kitchen bench....after that I surveyed the piles and had a cup of tea and Bex and a nice lie down.
However after much wailing and gnashing of teeth, two days later it was finally done (yes, you read that right...TWO DAYS). There is now about 1/4 of the 'stuff' and despite being a bit anxious about the process the girls are now really happy with the organisation and all the space. They even found toys they forgot they had.
I, on the other hand, am totally bewildered. We don't buy them lots of toys, they get some toys at birthdays and Christmas, lots of books and they like games and puzzles but that's pretty much it. Where possible we try to encourage gift buyers to give them 'experiences' rather than more toys. I even managed to limit the amount of stuff that comes from friends and acquaintances with this email last year. So where does it all come from?
I don't know, but I'm beginning to suspect that the toys are breeding.
I'm struggling to get back to any kind of routine after the festive season. It took me ages to unpack all the bags after our holiday and I still feel that everything is just a little disorganised (except my bathroom cabinet which I cleaned out yesterday). Of course we have another 3+ weeks of school holidays so it will be some time before we get back to complete normality ('normal' being a relative term around here).
Next week is shaping up to be very busy, the girls will be doing daily swimming lessons and although Tom is still on holiday he has some contract work to complete and I have a number of things I MUST do for the business. We'll be battling for computer time and fighting over whose turn it is to take the girls to their swimming lesson, should be a fun week.
I feel I should say something about the future, this being a brand new year and all. I have no resolutions for 2009, I don't really 'do' resolutions - I can never keep them - but I have a lot of hope that this will be a much better year than 2008. I also have some personal and business 'goals', things I'd like to achieve rather than things I resolve to do (or not do). Most of all I hope to make 2009 a happier year by enjoying the journey a bit more, taking it all a bit less seriously, having more 'fun' (whatever that is) and getting away for short breaks more often. I don't expect this year to be any less busy than last year was, but I'd like to handle it a bit better by remembering to stop occasionally.
This year I will try not to be a slave to stress and worry and sadness.
And I'll keep blogging, my second blogiversary is coming up, can't quit now.
....my treasured blog friends the happiest of years. I hope, in 2009, you thrive in peace and prosperity and write lots of posts for my entertainment.
A big cyber hug to you all.
Resolutions are horrible things so if you make any only make nice ones, like 'laugh more' (except you Dave, please don't laugh at all) or 'eat more chocolate' or 'take a nap every day'. At least those resolutions are easy to keep.
